din went work todae cos yest watched vcd till mornin den slp. heh! sorry sharon!!
paiseh sia.. KUKU sae i look darn shy. but she's jus tryin to sae im anti social!! haha. does my face haf "im shy" tis 2words on it?? y lk everybody oso noe i don dare to tok in real life n onli tok in sms all tat.. haha. but im nt anti social la.. im so FRIENDLY.. =) BUBU!!
was nua-ing whole dae at hm watchin vcd. was kinda sian ah but nvm, gt some KUKU entertainin mi.. haha. she said my face look funny. reali meh? y lk everybody oso sae my face look funny wen i nv do anything.. pancake said tat too, althou till nw i still duno y she laff wen she saw my face.

SUDDENLY, joyce msged mi n sae she left smth outside my door. sooo shocked ahh! cos im lyin on de sofa in my livin rm watchin vcd but i din c her at all!! luckily she din c mi..cos im wearin boxer.HAHA! tink she mus be actin lk a thief n put smth outside jiu faster run awae. haha. tou tou mo mo~ somemre she put it at a corner which canot be seen easily! hai mi find so long den tot she bluff mi. haha. but duno y wen i saw tat thing n de note, i jus smile to myself. haha thanx alot for bein so sweet to mi afterall.. one mre note to kp inside my wallet =) but can somebody tell mi, does cactus nid sunlight?? if put inside my rm will it die?? haha. i noe no one loves mi mre than u do =)

i jus wan de one i love to be dere for mi, watched mi while im playin in a match, love mi wholeheartly, make mi feel secure, to be sensible enuff, show mi tat she reali care, understand mi, communicate well wif mi, to dote n pamper mi cos i lk pple treat mi lk a small kid cos maybe all along pple ard mi haf been treatin mi tis wae. is all these so difficult?
im nt a romantic person, i duno hw to show n wat to sae, im nt gd in sweet talks, i cant make de one i love to feel secure, i duno hw to fight for de one i love, i duno hw to kp de one i love by my side, im afraid to commit, im afraid to hurt n get hurt.

im getting old;

i need someone to rely on;

todae durin work gt a lil gal v funny. she's holdin hammy's puppet n start singin "i lk ta move it move it, u lk ta move it move it" haha lil gal u gt de wrong cartoon.. hammy is frm over the hedge nt madagascar..


felt so dui bu qi myself.. i said tats gonna be de last time i cried for u. but todae my tears still flow, all becos of u! nehneh purposely one rite. haha. tis time reali gonna be de last time!! but nvm, im happy for u, pancake. HAHA.
and ya, for butter, nth goes well wif it except pancakes. but butter still can find bread or corn! haha crap. aniwae i realise actualli all along we remain as frens bu shi hao.. y itchy butt go start so many tings..ended up so many troubles n misunderstandin. heh!
i din noe i will still feel so hurt.
u left footprints in my life, remindin mi nt to make de same mistake again.


was watchin de taiwan drama 'er mo zai shen bian' jus nw.. omg tat guy so shuai..tat gal so pretty.. duno y while watchin kp tinkin of joyce..maybe cos she watch tat too. haha.
den watch till forget abt de time cos fel ask mi go online to teach her maths. next time mux charge her fees liao.. for bein her maths tutor. haha!

yest do report till 5am den slp. will die ah but luckily kuku insomnia den she crap wif mi till i finish my report n slp. haha n i gt a new name BUBU frm her! reali vvvv tired den din manage to drag myself up for lesson tis mornin. end up onli went for lesson at 1.. heard frm them tat my poa lecturer lookin for mi todae due to my poor attendance. ahhh.. aniwae in my report i write till v tok cock den wen karen dey all read, dey laff till v kua zhang. but im proud of myself cos i completed it myself! althou it's all craps. haha.
after skool went cck mit liz n lacilia cos suppose to go panjang play ball wif de rest but in de end rain so cancelled. den i rem todae's wo cai wo cai gt abt bungs so dey went my hse watch.. stupid joyce said nw she realise sg bungs r nth compare to taiwan de. nehneh...doesnt mean shuai jiu shi gd rite! haha.
sian ah tml gonna work alone cos sharon sun den work =(
im havin a bad headache nw again!

FOM project presentation is finally OVER!!
feel so relax BUT nw haf to rush for my CD report. damn it ahh. somemre im grp wif caiying, lux n yida. we soooo slack one la nw grp tog dieee ah cos we alwaz nv do anything one. so nw i haf to rush for individual report n grp report! tink will split half half wif caiying for de grp report. neh neh guys at dere shake legs onli. haha. i've to complete de report todae cos tml haf to hand in!!

i din went for POA lecture n Econs tutorial again. haha duno y my brain kp tellin mi to go bac slp n i did. =) den went skool ard 1plus to mit de rest n change in formal to prepare for our presentation. cos gt 2grps presenting todae den we in toilet change den everyone lk so nervous lidat. den yujin suddenly kick our proj board den i scold her in jokin manner den kaingee at a side kp askin yujin to beat mi lidat den in de end she wan bite mi. it's all kaingee fot!!

went for bball trg todae. is de last trg till one mth lata den resume cos of exams. after trg went clementi eat wif coach n de rest. liwei vvv mean la.. she kp bluffin mi. wen we in de station gg up, cos i tokin to liz den liwei point at towards pasir ris dere n sae go up dere den i still gong gong listen to wat she said until i tink n tink y clementi is tat side one meh.. neh neh..... after tat wat she sae i oso don believe den kp askin ml izit true cos all de wae wat she sae lk all jus bluff mi one. haha. while eatin v funny cos dey start to tok dirty den coach join in wif them oso -.- but de wae dey tok reali can laff till pengs ahh.. cos liwei sae de tomyum dere nice but end up i eat nt nice one. tink je one beta. haha. cos she sit beside mi kp tokin to mi den i eat till v slow she jiu sae y i eat so slow all tat.. duno is hu fot la.. haha after tat wat i sae she oso don believe liao althou i didnt bluff her.. den bun n cat dey all was lk askin hu is str or crk one den dey ask liwei den jus skip to ml instead of mi. den i was lk "eh y nv ask mi? im str lei". haha den dey don believe mi...too bad =p den liwei don believe im single until i ask ml to tell her i am. funny her..first time tok to her so much.

okay time to rush for my report if nt tonite reali no nid to slp..


[05]
y u alwaz don tell mi hw u feel?
u didnt sae, hw u expect mi to noe?
all along i ask u n u jus kp quiet.
u jus kp everything to urself.
nt tat i will eat u up or wat.
i jus wan to noe hw u feel.
althou we're jus frens nw but i still care.
althou i noe u will sae tat in my heart dere's onli her,
ya i admit dere's still her,
but im tryin to forget abt everything,
but it's nt easy.
i don wan u to wait for mi,
cos everything will nt be de same anymore.
aniwae doesnt mean i laff or joke ard means i reali feel happy,
im not.

XLIAN: neh neh if i nv post anything, hw u gg to let ur time pass so fast durin work? u complain sae ur fren nv post their blog so i post k... oso nv ask u to read ahhh. kpo.


ahhh i feel so relieved after sayin out tings to u for de last time. if u still don wana believe den i haf nth to sae.

todae go skool for poa tutorial onli la. neh neh suppose to haf fom presentation todae but our tutor din come skool! so we haf to postpone to tml. argh i haf to bring alot of tings tml! beta if she didnt come tml oso den we can drag to next wk. heh can drag jiu drag cos i reali donwan to present!! was late for poa tutorial todae den wen i went into de class, mr cheng was lk 'wah i finally came for his lesson oready'. after lesson went fc6 den wee kiat told us fom cancel todae n it's still quite earli n i haf to wait for liz to finish her test. so mi, karen, yujin, charmaine n jonathon went graduates' guild dere cos dey wana play pool. reali cant stand jonathon ahh.. he nv fails to joke ard n i cant stop myself frm laffin wen he dance de crazy frog dance. but he alwaz lk to scare yujin till she haf to hide behind mi n ended up she cry. bth~ wen we play de bishi bashi thingy, all thanx to karen n yujin, cos i onli use 1 credit n win all de wae till de game end. end up dey duno spent hw much on tat game. haha! but de 2 of them jus cant stop shoutin wen playin -.- cos dey anyhow choose de names den one gt 'big boss' n another one gt 'PuddingEater'. gt tat heng nt lidat oso mus remind mi of tat.. while walkin thru de stadium, karen was lk 'xp come do ur fav pull up' -_-" but she said tat jus becos she noe i hate to do pull up.. play till ard 2plus den we went off n i went to mit liz.
dumb her make mi wait outside de toilet for 15mins den she called n sae she's stuck in de lib cos she duno hw to use de machine to borrow de cd. -.- i oso nv borrow any bks or cd before den she ask mi equals to nv ask. end up i've to walk all de wae to de lib n end up nearly lost my wae. haha. in de end de cd mus go counter borrow one la!
den we went town.. walk frm ps to heeren to lido. leg pain la.. she insist tat she wanted to eat pepper lunch so we did. tink de whole dae i kp hittin her cos wat she said reali make mi remind of u. she remind mi one time i diao her one time. ended up she don dare to sae anything but wen she didnt tok, i diao her again. haha!

tml presentation... AHHHHHHH


i feel so free nw!!


im suppose to sae.. im still lovin u in my heart.

ya nw i noe im blind! i duno y wld i trust u wen ur suspecting mi.. ya right so u tink im writin all these jus wana seek pity frm everyone! since u don trust mi n i don find de need to trust u anymore.
im reali disappointed in u. i swear i didnt sae anything bad abt u after u explained to mi! before tat im jus too harsh to text u all doze. tis gonna be de last post im writin abt u! nw i realise all along im jus wastin my time!
ur reali nt her. she doesnt tok to mi tis wae. she doesnt suspect mi. y mus u suspect mi wen i didnt lie to u at all??? do u noe it reali hurts? u don believe. u will onli tink i jus wan pple to pity mi. den let it be. tis gonna be de last time i cired for u.

hmm pf tok to mi n ask mi wat happen. i told her n she sae nw den i realise hw she felt tat time. ahh makes mi felt guilty. maybe it's all retribution! it's somehow similar case as wat it is nw. cos tat time cos of joyce, i left her. cos tat time she love mi at de wrong time n i left her in de end n she was v hurt tat time. arghh im sorry.. den she said she kp studyin in order nt to tink of mi den end up she score v gd results n all thanx to mi. haa funny gal. she asked mi next time go club tog, duno y i hate to hear tat so much nw. hmm nw i noe hw she felt tat time. in de end, she ask mi to fight for de one i love. nt tat i donwan to, but everything haf changed..
todae went for dinner wif my family. my stupid sis jus love to gek mi. she pat mi n sae "don be so sad oready" but she sound sarcastic n nt consoling mi at all! den while eatin, i was tellin my mum tat i gonna wear specs soon cos i cant c clearly den my sis added "cry too much liao izit". den thruout de dinner she kp purposely say abt her bf n love thingy den i was lk 'wth..u beta watch out..' but ok la..i noe she don mean it.
im so nervous nw cos of tml presentation!! damn paiseh one la. im feelin much beta todae. din cry so much =)

i donwan to get u off my life,
but i haf to. understand?
i will onli suffer mre if i don.
but nth gonna change anything abt u, everything of u in my phone remain, esp in my heart.

din went skool todae again. woke up late den mite as well don go since still will get naggin frm tutor. din went for lectures in de noon oso. argh if end up i cant tk exam is all my fot ahh. cos my attendance definitely less than 75%. tink my classmates seems mre worried abt my attendance sia. karen tis mornin kp naggin mi faster prepare n go for stats tutorial cos i miss alot oready but i sae i will go tk mc.. but end up too lazy so nv go c doc. den kaingee ask mi don be late tml cos poa tutorial i oso pon till canot pon oready. tml havin fom presentation, argh i reali hate presentation. somemre mux wear formal n reali look damn kuku la.



i've oready said tat it's my fot. i didnt make any effort between us. n all along we're frm diff world, no matter wat we're nt meant to be tog. i did tink y wld all these happen. i noe partly is my fot. but do u tink ur at fot too? u alwaz sae u feel insecure wif mi. but wat u wan mi to do? all becos i joke abt other pple n u feel insecure, but i don lk them. i duno wat u wan mi to do in order to show u tat i did love u wholeheartly. u tink u didnt make mi feel insecure? it's worse than tat. cos wat u do, i dislike cos we're frm diff world. ya u said tat all these wont happen if i make effort between us, but u tink i don wan to? for de past few wks u started to treat mi so cold n i noe it isnt de same anymore but yet u deny. u tink i don make any time for u? n u sae i rather mit my frens? becos of u, i didnt mit my frens alot of time n sometimes is reali canot don go den u sae i rather mit them than u. u didnt mit ur frens? ur so busy tat everydae ur meetin someone, u tink u still haf time for mi? u said u definitely make time for mi if i wan to mit u, but i donwan to interfere ur life n end up u cant mit ur frens.

i don wish to noe since wen j appear in ur life, cos i donwan to noe hw long haf i been a fool. n nw u can c her everydae, gd for u. ya we're nt reali tog, i cant blame u for lovin someone else wen she treated u nice. wen i joke abt SINGLE N AVAILABLE, FREE TO MINGLE, u gets angry. but did i mingle? did i make myself reali available for others? im jus jokin n i din mean it but wat did u do behind my bac?? all along my heart is onli for u but wat did i get? i noe i noe. is my fot for makin all these happen. but do u noe wat makes mi so sad nw? all ur sweet talks means nth. "it's hard to love n forget someone" r u sure? i noe u wont sae tis. is silly hu said tat, nt u.
u said im droppin hints n pickin hints, den u? u tink u make mi feel tat u reali love mi? no!
u used drunk as ur excuse. don lie to urself. u noe long ago de one u love is her. y cant u jus tell mi earlier? jus becos u said u duno hw to tell mi n donwan to make mi hurt? wth is tat? u said i listen to my frens wen dey duno anything abt us? did i? i admit i did believe wat dey said in de first place, but after wat u said, i believe u. n dey tink im stupid. sometimes outsiders tend to noe mre tings which r maybe true.
since ur movin on happily nw, y shld i still ownself emo-ing? but it's nt easy.. i jus wan her bac...de old her.
u wont noe memories hurts.
gal, i reali cant forget u.

nw u've her, ur nt my silly. i don nid u anymore n u don nid mi anymore, cos ur nt silly.
i don treat u as my silly so wat u said doesnt mean anything to mi. de one i love is still my silly, nt de present u.


if you come back-
Can you feel me?(Baby can you feel me?)
I've got something to say
Check it out
For all this time
I've been lovin' you girl
Oh yes I have
And ever since the day
You left me here alone
I've been trying to find
Oh, the reason why
So if I did
Something wrong
Please tell me
I wanna understand
'Cause I don't want
This love to ever end
And I swear
If you come back
Here's my life
Baby, till the end of time
(Come back to me Come back to me Here's my life)
And I swear
I'll keep you right
By my side
'Cause baby
You're the one I want
(Come back to me Come back to me Here's my life)
Oh yes you are
I watched you go
You've taken
My heart with you
Oh yes you did
Every time
I tried to reach you
On the phone
Baby you're never there
Girl you're never home
So if I did something wrong
Please tell me
I wanna understand
'Cause I don't want
This love to ever end
No, no, no, no
I swear
If you come back
Here's my life
Baby, till the end of time
(Come back to me Come back to me Here's my life)
And I swear
I'll keep you right
By my side
'Cause baby
You're the one I want
(Come back to me Come back to me Here's my life)
Oh yes you are
Maybe I didn't know
How to show it
And maybe
I didn't know
What to say
This time
I won't, this time
Then we can
Build our lives
Then we can
Be as one
I swearIf you come back
Here's my life
Baby, till the end of time
(Come back to me Come back to me Here's my life)
Oh yeah
And I swear
I'll keep you right
By my side
'Cause baby
You're the one I want
Oh yes you are
And I swear
If you come back
Here's my life
Baby, till the end of time
And I swear I'll keep you right By my side



here without u-
A hundred days have made me older
Since the last time that i saw your pretty face
A thousand lies have made me colder
And i don't think i can look at this the same
But all these miles that seperate
Disappear now when i'm dreaming of your face
I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And i dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight it's only you and me
The miles just keep rollin'
As the people leave their way to say hello
I've heard this life was overrated
But i hope that it gets better as we go
I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And i dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl its only you and me
Everything i know,and anywhere i go
It gets hard but it wont take away my love
And when the last one falls
When it's all said and done
It gets hard but it wont take away my love
I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And i dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl its only you and me


because of you-
I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did
You fell so hard I learned the hard way, to never let it get that far
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake a smile, a laugh
Every day of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with
Because of you I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid
I watched you die
I heard you cry
Every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry In the middle of the night
Over the same damn thing
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I tried my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you I am afraid
Because of you

don haf de mood for skool todae. din go for EC lesson in de mornin n i rem wrongly tat my econs lecture is at 1pm, ended up i reach skool at 2. in de end din attend any lesson todae n studi wif my classmates till 5 cos stats test. i absorb nth inside my brain. was listenin songs while studyin n started cryin. sorry guys for dao-ing u all whole dae. i don mean it. but thanx for de pocky. hazel kaingee n kaiwei bought mi a pocky n dey drew smth on de box. kinda touched. wen i finally cool dwn abit, my stupid sis called, n she ask mi don cry anymore. wtf. becos of tat i cried even mre after tat. pple pls don ask mi nt to cry, i duno y i will started cryin if pple ask mi don cry.
after de test met liz go tiong den met lacilia dere. haf some session tat mi n lacilia enjoy but liz hate it. sorry liz! kp remindin liz nt to mention abt her but her mouth reali cant stop askin den i kp askin lacilia to slap her. den liz help mi burn awae de paper n she sae i shld burn awae my sorrows jus lk hw de paper is burnt. crap she tink tats easy. after tat jac n her fren huijun came to find us. went to eat n dey kp tokin abt it, i don wish to listen but dey jus tok abit too loud. den jac n liz started to matchmake mi n huijun -.- jac was lk "tis one(pointin at huijun) nt bad wat" den i jus pei he her n ask huijun "okay so wats ur num?" den dey started teasin mi till my face blush lk nobody business. so paiseh la face so hot. den thruout dey kp teasin n teasin den wen huijun praise mi, i paiseh den dey sae i shy. im shy to pple whom im nt close to wat..cos huijin live in sk den we tk de same train den wen we gg in de train, stupid them jus kp giggling n sae till lk dere's smth gg on between us lidat. even we use de same hp den liz oso wan tease -.- cant stand them..

guys i noe wat u all said is for my own gd. but it's nt jus a crush. i noe it's nt worth it but u all tink it's so easy to forget someone?? u all jus sae tings out infront of mi but did u all care abt hw i feel?
everyone is sayin she's jus playin wif my feelin but i still choose to believe her. cos de one i trust is my silly, nt de gdine nw. everytime wen i tink abt it, my tears jus flow. i din noe i can be so weak. i reali treat it as she's dead n tats wat hurt mi de most. imagine someone u love so much suddenly gone n nv be bac. someone sae she saw u 2 in sk. ur wif her.. nt mi anymore. u don haf to feel sorry or wateva shit. i've said it alot of times. ur nt my silly. i don treat u as her. my silly is alwaz my silly, nt u. n pls don call my name, as in write my name inside de msg. onli my silly can call mi tat, nt u.

feel sooo xin ku lk smth is pressin on mi. my tears r all trap inside. can i jus let it all out at once??

silly, where'd you go? come bac to mi...in my dream.

is tis retribution?

i noe no matter hw disappointed n sad i get, i still believe wat u said. i hope wat u said nw r nt lies, althou it's de fact tat u've fall for her, i cant do anything. jus blame myself for all these happening. im de one to blame for givin u up in de first place n nt makin any effort between us. maybe ur right. all these problems lies wif mi.
i reali hope wat i heard r nt true. but it's de fact.
i reali miss her. i mean de one in my heart. i've been feelin sooo bad. de feelin is jus lk she've reali died n i can no longer find her bac. she's still in my heart. it reali feels so hurt cos she can nv be bac. i've to kp tellin myself ur nt her, definitely nt her. she wont sae or do such things to mi. onli lyin to myself can make mi feel beta. even if u appear right infront of mi, ur nt her. she live in my heart, nt u.
do u noe hw izit feel lk to cry myself to slp? n de moment i woke up started cryin again wen i saw stitch? i hate to cry cos i alwaz said cryin is useless. but i noe it's hard to ctrl.
make tat all a dream. a sweet dream between mi n her. nw im awake n noe all doze r jus dreams, i can onli love u frm behind.

it all started wif "XIAOPING COME DO UR PULL UP!"
started wif a msg sayin my orange shirt is too bright cos i don wana get hit by cars.
started wif our first "date" at de airport, i complain tat dere's no plane flyin, u ate ur so-call-nice-mashed-potato, our first conversation on paper while we're jus sittin beside each other, u drew 'silly baichi' on my econs notes.
went to watch over the hedge, ur crazy over hammy n tat car wif de tooth tat u said looks lk mi, i accidentally hit u wif de pastamania menu n u looks lk u gonna kill mi for tat, walk till cathay for ben & jerry, im ben n ur jerry.
before u left for hk, both of us r so upset, went sk to mit u for dinner n i cant order my kiddy set A all becos u didnt read de menu carefully n make mi paiseh, nt forgettin out 5mins madness, here comes hammy.
wen ur bac frm hk, here comes stitch, u haf nth beta to do n came up wif a idea to walk frm taka to ps n ps bac to taka, went pepper lunch, u anyhow order a spicy chic for mi n it tasted weird, u wrote smth on de feedback form n i get so upset wen i accidentally tore it wen my classmate snatch frm mi, u said ur afraid of losin mi, i told u tat i will nt leave.
airport again, supposingly to be studyin but end up lookin at planes which don fly again, u've been high over seein so many of ur bfs at dere, u walk too fast into de skytrain n left mi outside, i sae ard mi r all ur bfs, u ask mi nt to worry cos ur mine.
esplanade library, u gave mi a rose, suppose to studi but end up havin our paper conversation again, u a smiley on my hand n i draw bac a big mole for u, went to eat n u shell de prawns for mi wen i said i don wana eat, england-portugal match, u owe mi 10fishballs.
night safari tour, was dark n hot, cant c de animals but i get high over otter, u fan mi usin de useless map, finally u became clever n fold it into a fan-shaped n fan, althou nt much diff, u wanted to eat ur so-called-nice-prata-at-jlnkayu, we've our goreng-hangman-bingo sessions, i said u cant win mi in bingo n u still play cheat, u started givin stupid words lk macdonald for hangman n i started usin KFC, my stomach ache end our dae.

we noe we're frm diff world, wat we lk n don lk r totally diff. but she said things can be done, u said we're nt meant for each other. she said im de one hu made her heart skipped, made her gif up de whole world for, u said love canot be force n it's beta if we remain as frens. all de above memories r between mi n her, nt u. i noe she's leavin mi, i cant do anything but to love her inside my heart. de gdine i love is her, nt u..

yest went kaingee hse do proj. frm 12 lidat do till 6plus. duno y reach her hse jiu started sneezin lk hell den flu till my nose almost drop.. buden left her hse jiu quite ok oready. met ahlu go jp eat den went yuhua find de rest. dey playin ball buden mi, liz n lacilia sit at playground chat. den duno y dey started tokin abt ghost festival again -.- while on de wae walkin to station to go hm, smth happen. duno y i so smart i guess de playground correctly. heh. after 1hr plus of pulling pushing arguing diao-ing, she finally went hm. actualli im nt bad in hong-ing pple wat, at least she laff in de end. heh. cos after tat thingy oready too late den mi, lacilia n jessie went fel hse slp. sorry guys for makin u all wait under de void deck for so long~
slp at her hse till 11plus den dey went eat n i went hm cos promise sharon gg work todae so rush hm den rush to work. i din noe todae will turn out to be such a bad dae. haf been emo-ing whole dae todae. normally work wif sharon sure lots of laughter but todae i din tok much at all, needless to sae laff. after work duno y don feel lk takin train. took bus n damn it. de route it travel r doze we went once. fuck.

okay im dead nw. im havin stats test tml wen i slp thru every stats lecture n didnt do any stats tutorial at all = i noe NTH abt stats. n i rem im havin stats test tml. im gonna fail it badly.


i din noe tis will hurt mi so much. wen i said it to u, im jus sad. but wen i heard it frm u, it jus hurt so deepy inside. i jus control my tears wen i saw tat, somemre im in de train -.- whole dae been thinkin abt doze daes n lookin bac at doze msges. all these make my tears flow lk nobody business. frm de beginnin i told u we're frm diff world, ur de one hu sae things can be done n nw u finally realise tat things cant be done for 2 diff world. in de end u still walk out of my life.


[05]
i don wish u wait for mi cos i cant promise u tat in de end de ans i gif u izit de one u wan. but it's difficult. is nt onli crush. i nid time. alot alot alot of time. i hope u understand. cont move on wif ur life.

im so weak nw.. havin flu cum sorethroat cum cough cum headache nw. lk hands n legs all v soft n weak liao. TORTURE.
todae after skool jiu went hm cos kinda xin ku ah. tk train wif karen, yujin n charmaine. funny la yujin kp disturbin karen den she v fed up jiu beat mi. im damn innocent can.. mi n charmaine onli kp laffin lor den she still beat mi for nth. is yujin tease her one den she beat mi -.- tml earli in de mornin gg kaingee hse do proj.. ahhh at cck lei mus wake up so earli. killllll mi.

i admit i kp lookin ard for u. but i duno wat shld i react wen i saw u. even though wen u saw mi, u still smack my head as usual, it isnt de same anymore.

it's so hard to get u off my mind.
i miss u soooo.

some dummy jus overslept n make mi wait lk a baichi for half hr. okay althou it's nt v long but is enuff to make mi an idiot. cos my lesson is onli at 9 den waited till 8 lidat jiu went off cos noe tat dummy sure still slpin. don wana go skool so earli so went je for longjohn breakfast. *@&#^*@#
todae in skool v kelian ahh. dey kp sayin i pervert cos dey ask mi hold a cardboard den i kiddin sae wan use it to fan hazel's skirt buden cos she wearin denim skirt den canot fly up one. den dey ask charmaine be careful of mi -.- cos my tshirt behind gt '7447' den yujin kp callin mi "7447!!" den lk callin criminal lidat.. haa. im nt a pervert pls.
todae fom lesson mre paiseh ahh. cos other grp havin their presentation todae den durin Q&A session, we're suppose to "shoot" them wif qns. den i gt smth to "shoot" but paiseh don dare sae den jiu ask ivyna to sae. cos she gt some part miss out den mi beside her whisperin to her wat to sae lidat den kaingee dey all saw jiu was lk "orrhhhhh. is xp idea to shoot one". paiseh ah den whole class noe oready den i shy. haa.
after skool mit ml for trg cos liz gt test den she late. before trg still purposely ask ml go outside dere sit, jus to look at de field to c whether is she dere. but jus no fate..i jus cant c her everytime. after trg went to eat wif ml, liz n otah. den tok abt hungry ghost festival. argh it's jus next tues! so pple~ pls don ask mi go out frm next tues onwards till 2mths lata. thank you =)

damn ah havin flu again nw. duno y everytime argue or quarrel sure flu one. sucks/


u duno tat without u, i can nv be happy.
u duno tat im alwaz lookin ard for u.
u duno i alwaz hope to c u so much.
u duno hw disappointed i get wen i don get to c u.
u duno my mind jus went blank n my heart will jus skipped a million times wen i c u.
u duno hw much u meant to mi.
but we can nv pleased each other.
maybe u don feel anything n all these u don feel de same at all.
althou i've been sayin tis alot of times, but i guess it's reali time to make de decision.
jus end everything.

din went for skool todae. cos havin sore throat n headache again!! is de 5th time i skipped POA tutorial oready n duno 4th or 5th time i skipped FOM tutorial oso. one word to describe mi nw. DIEEEEEEEEEEE. n im so lazy to go c doc n get a mc.. end up didnt get any LOA. kinda worried tat i cant tk de exams.. but it's all toooooo late. heh.

noe y nw i don sms or tok to u in msn first..cos i noe u wld reply v late.. n i reali don lk pple to reply mi v late or even forget abt replyin mi. so i rather wait till u msg mi wen ur free..

duno y so qiao everytime mi n karen sure tk same train. last lesson our tutor oready ask both of us don late but we're still late todae! so we decided nt to go to class n went fc2 to eat mac n studi poa instead. haha. todae tat yujin sot sot one ah. help mi massage den kp tickle my neck..cos she sae i look lk turtle -.- pple pls don touch my neck n ear!! den she gif mi alot of stupid names again -.- n charmaine call mi xiaobian oso!! bth~~ haha.
aniwae im gonna flung my poa test! disappointin ahh.. althou i last min den studi but tot i understand oready but end up no time to do n i onli complete 1 out of 3qns!!
after test went for bball trg wif ml n yvonne.. no coach todae so onli play 5on5. my throat is killin mi nw....pain~~
after trg mit her den went hm. seems lk ages since i last met her.

im mre sensible nw(heh!). don wana kp u by my side if u donwan to. if u wan leave, jus leave. wan stay, jus stay. as long as ur happy. it seems lk we're gettin further apart each dae. if we're happier tis wae, jus let it be. don wana get affected by u everydae. if nt sooner or lata i'll suffer frm depression. heh.


[15o5] so u've oready move on? nt tat i wana interfer ur life but jus bein curious ma. u alwaz ask my things den i ask urs, u oso don sae. selfish one rite gd things nv share. haaa

todae in skool lk v fast end sia cos skipped de last FOM lecture. cos str awae after econs lecture is FOM den after econs lecturer left, i jus prepare to slp onli den hazel dey all sae go go go den all left de lecture. den mi n karen faster pack our tings n left oso. haha. actualli is go hm to studi POA buden i reach hm abt 3pm den watch tv till halfwae fell aslp den jus nw abt 9 den woke up. haha. sure dieeee for POA ahhh. no mood to studi~
den dey kp playin wif my name todae -.- Siow Peng is NOT pronounce as SIO PENG!! stupid caiying laaaa. haha. okay i shall go n watch my tv nw. POA lata gt mood den studi. haha.

one gal i can nv leave..

went to work todae. den at eunos dere cos mux wait for de train quite long den v thirsty jiu go Mr Bean buy drinks den sit dere drink den suddenly someone pop out infront of mi. is xiaohui..xia dao mi sia.. haha. end up de train came but i haben drink finish den she go first.
after work mit liz, ahlu, ml n otah at bugis.. went V8 to eat but de fish n chips r small till so pathetic ah!! den de spag gt toilet smell. haha! go walk walk den help liz makeover. haha cos all of us tink she v wasted ah. she gt de looks buden alwaz heck care her image one. mi tis kind canot rely on looks jiu mus be v image conscious. haha! buden mi n ahlu help her choose clothes till v pek chek. cos we lk de she don lk.. buden canot make her too shuai cos she oready gt de looks liao den she too shuai jiu nobody notice mi oready!! haha. den walk till nth to walk oready mi jiu bring them go eat de fruit ice thingy.. tink i bring many pple dere oready lor. haha. funny la cos we kp teasin liz den mi n ahlu sae alot den laff till our mouth ache sia. den ml oso join in.. liz don angry la~ play play onli.. haha.
sian ah tml is mon~ hai studi studi studi........
tues havin POA test but i didnt studi anything yet! worst is i alwaz skipped POA lectures so i duno anything abt de topics tat r gonna be tested. DIEEEEEEEE.

went sentosa wif ahlu, liz n lacilia todae. den lacilia sae mi n ahlu look lk couple cos tink we too gay oready. haha! at dere sun tann till fall aslp sia den ahlu kp throwin sand on mi den woke mi up. after sentosa went je to eat tomyum again. heh! normally while eatin we sure tok tok but todae v quiet..onli can hear sniffin n coughin. haha cos v hot ahh.. eat till sweat n mucus oso will drip out. haha nt tat disgustin actualli. after eatin our lips all v red. SEXY! heh.
after eatin we went batok play ball wif joyce, ml, huiying n weite.. but onli dey play den i sit dere watch onli cos donwan make myself smelly. haha. kinda funny cos dey wana matchmake weite n huiying den we v crap.

v slpy nw.. gonna slp soon oready. haf to work tml =(


it's all abt hurting-

todae slp till v shuang cos outside rainin heavily den reali feel lk gg bac slp but canot ah cos tis wk i haben go for any POA lesson. haha so haf to drag my feet n guai guai go skool.. cos todae karen even mre late than mi den she tk cab to skool.. at first still wonderin will c hazel at raffles place nt den wen de train reach dere, suddenly a head pop out infront of mi den is hazel sia. haha so qiao.. but xia dao mi eh.
after skool went fc5 to wait for liz den halfwae saw micheal jiu went to eat wif him. kinda long nv c him liao sia den jiu chat abt his dragon boat den he ask y i quit canoe all tat.. aiya~~ den liz kp naggin at mi to go bac to canoe oso..wateva reasons i tell her, she still will sae is i weakling so no pt explainin.. on de wae to mrt station saw andrea den she smile to mi. heh heh.. buden liz jus lk to oppose mi la.. i sae gd lookin den she sae nt...is she no taste. haha!
mit lacilia at dover n went to huiyu hse to mit her, qihui n jinhui. kinda fun ah cos v long nv play ball wif them oready.. play till halfwae gt some guys fightin in de other court den we faster packed our bags n left. haha! is oso cos jh wan go airport so we jiu left.. mi, liz n lacilia kinda hungry oready jiu tk bus to je cos wan eat de tomyum thingy but we took de wrong bus! end up took cab dwn but reach dere oready closed liao cos oready 11pm -.- end up went to eat fishball noodle.. nt bad la je gt alot of nice food. haha.
gg sentosa wif ahlu, liz n lacilia tml.. mus relax relax... sun den go work. haha!


ur alwaz sayin A but doin B. i reali duno wat ur thinkin, wat u wan, whether u mean wat u said. cos wat u said is totally diff frm wat u do. i reali don lk it n i've enuff of all these.. in de first place we noe we're frm diff world so we shldnt start at all. we can nv be tog. maybe liz is right, u will onli tink of mi wen ur free, but ur alwaz busy. i don wana make myself holdin on to it for nth. seems lk im de onli one hu zai yi so much abt tis between us..i will tell myself nt to. cos im sooo tired of all these.
okay yuan lai u went out wif her todae.. it's alwaz her her n her..

okay nw i cant fall aslp again.. it's all becos of u again.

todae overslept AGAIN. heh! end up go for FOM lesson onli. after tat went for bball trg. todae trg quite funny la cos we're jokin abt liz's foot. cant sae here if nt she will kill mi. haha. buden train doze formation reali will die ahh.. so many lor hw to rem! haha. cos gt a new comer todae den she sae she's frm tourism course de den ah bun tot i same course as her den de gal was lk "no la but she oso business course" haha taoyan sia yuan lai gt pple notice mi in skool one.. den ml jiu sae y she didnt c ml.. haha! i don mind ml call mi xiao bian buden todae while playin 5on5, suddenly in court she call mi xiao bian den lk abit weird n funny lidat. haha so nt use to it of hearin tat on court. after trg went je eat tomyum! nice nice.. but abit too hot den i choke till tears oso wan drop liao. haha.


it's so hard to leave u..

tis wk haf been a torture for mi ahh.. mon flu whole dae n my nose almost drop off! tues headache whole dae. todae din go skool cos still headache. but went to skool in de noon to submit smth den mit liz n her. went to skool cafe to tok tok but onli she n liz tokin cos dey tokin abt ghost stories den i v sian don feel lk listenin. after tat mi n liz mit lacilia, ml n otah go cut hair den go playground tok tok.de 2 stupid couples kp arguin den dey were lk kp sayin hw lacilia n ml treated them den machiam im de judge lidat. damn funny ahh.. den tink bac, actualli last time joyce didnt treat mi tat bad compare to theirs. haha! while eatin halfwae reali bth liao feel lk vomitin out oready jiu went to buy sour plum but no use!! duno y ml suddenly ask lacilia n liz abt mi, joyce n her. den lacilia v funny cos she sae tat im single n available, free to mingle. haha..abt 10plus den left de place n tk bus to lakeside. joyce v kua zhang cos she sae she can sense my presence.. she tot her sixth sense reali tat zhun. aiyer.
tml gt trg after skool ahhh.. hope i wont get headache again tml!! sian tml gt 3hrs of FOM tutorial.. gonna bored to death. recently alwaz went skool wif karen cos we alwaz late den todae i nv go skool she oso cant wake up end up i tink she go for de last 15mins of de last lesson. haha.

WHATEVER!!
u put whose foto oso can jiu shi canot u n him! @*#&*$#%#%

for de past 8mths, i've been buyin 1505 in 4D. but it nv come out before!! till todae..........it came out! somemre is exactly 1505!! waaaahhhhh heartpain ahhh. nowadaes busy buyin world cup den jiu nv buy 4D. wth ehh........den alot of pple kp msgin mi sae 1505 open in 4D -.-

damn man gt an ulcer on my tongue. pain ahhh!
tml gt EC n Econs test. sure dieeeeee. i reali duno anything abt Econs la. so many formula but i don even noe one!!! gonna fail damn jialat..

HAPPY BDAE SHARON LIM HUI QING LAOSAI!!

todae go taka find sharon cos i nv go work todae. go find her eat den while gg eat, saw peifen, paiseh paiseh. haha. sharon reali damn baichi i swear!! cos she bought a bottle of m&m n she put it in de drawer of de toys dere. den wen she go pack doze toys, suddenly a gal walked pass her holdin to de same bottle of m&m den she jiu v angry n sae wan go push tat lil gal cos she tot tat lil gal stole her m&m! den she sae she v angry cos she bought tat m&m but she haben eat any yet. HAHAHA den her expression damn funny la!! after tat she go check de drawer n found her m&m still lyin safely inside. she tinks she's de onli one hu haf tat m&m lidat. reali cant believe she's frm earli childhood sia.. mre lk abusin kids lidat. haha!

after eatin, we wait for jessie n wanhui den went batok tog.. end up i go dere didnt play ball jus sit dere watch them play n EAT!! haha. den celebrate sharon bdae n went hm. lata gt germany against portugal! althou i hope portugal to win but i wan germany to win cos i bet draw-germany =P im sorry portugal~
my sis's fren came my hse cos dey watchin soccer tog lata.. which means dey will be stayin in my hse..which means i haf to go slp wif my mum n bro =(


[i noe u hate me. but wat u wan mi to do?? wateva things i do, u will still be unhappy abt it. den? sometimes ur jus tinkin too much n wat i sae, u will still tk it as lies. den wat can i still do? both of us r livin our own life nw, althou u sae it's hard for u to move on, but i tink u've oready move on. jus tat sometimes we will still tink bac of de past. even if dere's no her, we still cant get bac, cos we've oready drifted apart.]

todae went skool wif karen again cos jux nice takin same train. todae ITAB sure flung lk siao ahhhh!! total gt 4worksheets to complete but i onli manage to complete 1! wth eh partly is cos i duno hw to do den i oso no time to do larrr.. my class was lk sayin we all can prepare to retake tat module next yr tog. haha!

after skool mit jerrydine go nite safari! at first liz n lacilia don wana go but after much psycho-ing, dey finally went wif us. heh! go dere kinda waste money ah cos whole place was damn dark n all animals was lk slpin la den cant c anything oso! but i lk otter!! it's damn cute ahhh!! tink we left abt 10plus den liz n lacilia went hm. den we went jln kayu dere eat cos near her hse. after eatin we still sit dere for v long n play alot of stupid games ah. n she lost to mi in bingo too! no kick! heh! halfwae i stomach pain den jiu tk cab hm ard 2plus. tired ahhh.... but still mux go sentosa wif ahlu.. so slpy...

<333

i gonna flung my ITAB test tml badly! somemre is over 35% ahhhh!! de ITAB book is simply USELESS la! nv teach anything oso den durin lesson de teacher teach de all i forgot oready la!! im DEAD tml!!

i duno wat im tinkin again. nightfalls, wth!
i need a break!!!

miracle rite im bac hm so earli todae. haha class end at ard 2 den jiu went hm oready cos super tired ahhh! tonite still mux stay up to watch portugal vs france! yest watch germany match halfwae jiu fall aslp oready. haha bth.
aniwae late for skool todae den jus nice karen oso late den we took de same train. seriously mi n her gt generation gap sia. haha she alwaz don understand wat i tokin abt den mus explain until v clearly. den by de time we reach class is oready 10.30 den everyone was oready dere listenin to class. den durin de lesson, my POA tutor tok to mi den de wae he tok reali can make mi pengs.
Mr cheng: xiaoping, y didnt u come lesson last wk? gt work part time izit?
me: (i forgot y i absent den jus anyhow sae) ehhhh overslept cos world cup ma.
Mr cheng: club?! u so young go clubbin??? canot lidat la mux come lesson canot go club..
me turn n look at karen den we kp laffin n laffin for abt hmm 5secs.
me: nt clubbin la.. is world CUP.
Mr cheng: oh ok but mux come for lesson u noe, since world cup finishin soon. ur attendance nt v gd. watch but DON bet k.
after tat he walk off den karen beside mi still kp laffin n laffin.. actualli is de wae he toks n his expression v funny ah.. duno y he everytime durin lesson oso use 'part time' n 'chic rice' as example den wen he mention these, my class sure kp laffin one. somemre he gt doze hongkong accent lidat. haha.

yeah tml FOM tutorial cancelled! means tml go skool frm 9am to 12pm onli~~ but tink after tat gg bugis wif my classmates cos haf to interview Missha's manager for our FOM proj thingy.. but aniwae, whether i can wake up tml for lesson is another problem. haha. aniwae yest trg sprained my index finger den nw swollen lk sausage sia..yest oso nt so swollen. cos is right hand den todae hold pen kinda weird. haa.

aniwae gg slp nw oready. mus store energy to watch tonite match. heh!


no status r/s is gd. as wat liz said, no committment, no stress, if suddenly no feelin can pai pai pi gu n leave. haha! tats wat liz said alrite. aniwae it's quite true n i tink gt its bad side oso la. no status = u cant interfer their life cos no right to do so, u duno wat r dey tinkin abt, sometimes kinda cold, jealousy will alwaz tk place. heh!

todae OVERSLEPT again! end up woke up tooo late liao den didnt go for any lesson. heh! but still gt go sp bball trg la.. serene n jerrydine came to try out de trg. jerrydine looks cooool in canoe polo but definitely looks weird in bball. haha!
lata gonna watch germany-italy match.. sure cant wake up tml ahhhhh!!

sorry cant stop myself frm tinkin. noe y im so scare. cos u appear in my life as my fren wen im dwn n sad, ur de one hu light up my life again. nw she is jus lk same situation as mi n of cos im scare tat u will walk into her life too.

todae in skool onli fall aslp durin EC lesson. but durin lectures, im awake!! haha cos karen sit beside mi kp askin mi stupid jokes but some r quite funny la. cos lesson reali too borin den i suggested to play BINGO. n i won all of them!! actualli lost one game to kaingee la. so consider draw wif her..tml mus win bac! haha mai siao siao can.....durin sec skool i oso alwaz win one hor. haha!
todae after skool went bugis to mit my mum, bro n sis. go walk walk den jiu went hm.. sian ahhh no mood to do stats tutorial at all.. but aniwae all along i nv do stats at all cos i noe nth abt it!! arghhhh~
tml after skool gt bball trg.. hmmmm....


i don ask, i don c, doesnt mean tat i don mind. jus don wana make myself hurt.

suppose to go for huiyu bball event thingy todae. but cos yest watch brazil match n i can onli slp for 1hr but i overslept n nobody call mi in de mornin!! ended up i woke up ard 2pm.. huiyu gonna kill mi for sure!! SORRY.
aniwae kinda shock tat brazil lost to france.. means next game portugal gonna play against france! nervous nervous!!
tink tml after skool gg my cousin hse. so excited can play wif de kids! althou im kinda anti-kid but my cousin's children r damn cute one! haha. my bro shuang la havin holi tml cos youth dae. y poly no youth dae????

i cant be a perfect lover.
it's so sad tat im nt de one u can confide to.

YES PORTUGAL WON!!
althou i no time go bet todae so hu win doesnt matter to mi buden i lk portugal beta so........ haha. but i won 10fishballs!! heh heh-

todae ard 2pm den woke up sia den nv go work. mit jerrydine at cityhall to go esplanade studi. she's late but nvm, cos she bought mi a rose. so sweet.. HAHA so weird to receive de rose frm her cos i've to hold it everywhere i go -.- cos next wk havin econs test den i duno anything abt de topics lo. but i studi le still don understand anything!! omg im gonna flung it tis time. went to eat after studyin.. stupid her kp smiling to herself...look so dumb. after tat haf to rush to tamp to mit my sis n her frens to watch portugal match buden wen i reached dere onli can watch 2nd half. damn nervous ar de match.. luckily portugal won. but steven gerrard is cute!! haha.
sian lei tml earli in de mornin mus go huiyu de event thingy dere. tink i no nid slp liao cos gg watch brazil match lata. haha.

it's natural for mi to feel LIKE TAT wen u go out wif her rite... even if is mi, u will feel tat oso de lo.. so cant reali blame mi for tat ma..haha
[it's all URS. =) ]

thanx to germany n argentina, im $15 richer nw. HAHA sounds so cheap!!

aniwae todae suppose to reach lecture on time but mi n karen waitin for hazel dey all den end up we reach de MLT at 11plus wen our lecture starts at 11. end up we don dare go in cos de lecturer v fierce one den we standin outside de MLT tryin to peek inside damn funny. haha ended up we went to flea market =) stupid manlin cheat my money for buyin her cookies at $2!
after skool mit manlin n went to bugis to mit joyce n ame den we walk walk awhile jiu went sbc to watch U18 youth cup finals. kinda sian sia de match. while walkin to mrt station jus nw, saw a COCKROACH but i cant possibly bring my secret weapon out wif mi n tat COCKROACH didnt offend mi, so i let it go. wahahaha im so nice rite?? =p

tml england vs portugal!! omg i duno hu to support but Deco red card cant play oready.. so sad.. tink england haf higher chance to win oready..